So this is how it goes...

Sleep Tight, Barcelona

Olivia — Sun, 25 Dec 2011 16:34:35 +0000

Merry Christmas

I Have a Long Night in Front of Me

Olivia — Mon, 19 Dec 2011 20:00:26 +0000

May I Walk With You?

Olivia — Thu, 15 Dec 2011 04:29:42 +0000

Brava, Laura

Olivia — Mon, 12 Dec 2011 05:56:26 +0000

Darling, I loved you
I long to become you
And know what it is that you gave

We dance the sorrow
Forgive me tomorrow
And I pray night after night, day after day
Would you watch my body weaken
My mind drift away?

Dear lover forsaken, our love is taken away

You were my speaker, my innocence-keeper
I don’t night after night, day after day
Would you watch my body weaken,
My mind drift away?

Dear lover forgiven, my love is driven by rage

Oh I should just leave you, instead I’ve deceived you
But I don’t
Night after night, day after day
Would you watch my body weaken and mind drift away?

I count to no one, hold nobody’s ear
I sold you my hand once and you hit me in fear
I don’t stand for the devil
I don’t whisper in ears
I stand on the mountains and call people to hear

It’s a sudden burst of light, it’s a fate foretold
It is knowing, it is knowing

He longs for the answers, as all of us must
He longs for the woman who will conquer his lust
He screams in the night, I scream in the day
We weep in the evening and lie naked and pray

Night after night, day after day
Night after night, day after day
Night after night, day after day
Would you watch my body weaken and my mind drift away?

It’s a tempting communion
It’s a fate foretold
It is knowing, it is knowing
What it is that you’re told

Living Across the Street from Burp Castle

Olivia — Wed, 07 Dec 2011 07:51:55 +0000

Monday, October 3, 2011, 1:45 AM

Fumble, cover, light.

I—very intentionally—have the sweet falsetto of Justin Vernon whispering in my ears.

It’s a sub-arctic night in comparison to the dog days of summer. I wanted to appreciate this before the rain comes tomorrow.

Breathe out.

I stand, shivering, and watch the last remnants of Sunday night souls withering away in the village.

I infuse the embers of my cigarette with my breath, just to watch them glow in contrast to the night-light.

The trash bags perched in front of me are partnered with substances too-often abused by my peers. I can feel their contents reach out and seep into my skin. More and more I notice that the withering souls are partnered up—not so withering. All-too-readily, I remember the warmth of the hand that lead me through last winter; how it felt to be in puppy-love in the lingeringly humid September air. Shorts and cautious caressing. But, it’s turned frigid once again, and this time without my life buffer. “It’s just like the love, the one that’s never been enough”

Look—it’s almost out. This went by too fast, but I can’t have another.

I’m reminded why I didn’t take a walk with this thing. I wanted to stand here. Stand and watch and shiver to not participate in this city—not right now, at least.

Drop, stomp, collect.

One Year Ago

Olivia — Wed, 07 Dec 2011 05:39:44 +0000

I lost a lot — I lost friendship, I lost love, I lost respect, and I lost myself. Never again will I allow this to happen. I’m sorry to those I’ve wronged. I’m apologizing to myself too because, well, it’s taken me this long to fully get back into the swing of things. You can’t bring me down anymore. If you plan on sobering up and being a nice human being again, then great. Otherwise, you’ve done your part. Now, go.

In a Cocoon

Olivia — Tue, 29 Nov 2011 14:24:36 +0000

I had a dream about you last night

Under Your Spell

Olivia — Sun, 27 Nov 2011 18:40:01 +0000

Nothin’ Like a Little Guilty Pleasure

Olivia — Fri, 18 Nov 2011 20:01:42 +0000

Excuses, Excuses.

Olivia — Sun, 13 Nov 2011 22:32:38 +0000

I don’t know what to do with this — all of it.

I don’t know what to do with my long, chipped nails.

I don’t know what to do with my skewed perception.

I don’t know what to do with this book I have yet to read.

I don’t know what to do with the time I checked a minute ago.

I don’t know what to do with the time I’ll check in a minute.

I don’t know what to do with this urge to shower many times in a day.

I don’t know what to do with his poems that I read.

I don’t know what to do with Monday at 10:15 AM.

I don’t know what to do with this feeling that I felt months ago.

I don’t know what to do with my disdain for my generation.

Oh, but mainly, I don’t know what to do with the sweater on my shoulders.